Where were you.....

9/11/2001

I walking through the sanitized hallways of Miriam Hospital towards the nurses' station, ending the last week of my internship when I heard some residents talking about the first plane crash.  I didn't think much of it at the time.  While reviewing my charts, I was overhearing nervous doctors trying to find out if their friends were ok.

After a just a few treatments I began to hear the horrifying news of the second crash.  Then more people began to worry.  As the day went on, and we learned of the disasters occurring in New York, our rehab manager had a meeting with the staff to attempt to review protocol if patients were going to be transferred to make room for others.  We didn't know to what extent our hospital was going to be needed.

I went home to my apartment to watch the horror unfold on TV.  It was unbelievable.  It was saddening.  It was our generation's Day of Infamy.  My grandparents had Pearl Harbor.  My parents had the JFK assassination.  And unfortunately, we have this.

Images of this day I can still see clearly and vividly.  The dust covered people running.  The collapse.  The chaos.

Now, ten years later, we have settled back into a routine of not looking up to the skies and wondering what would be next.  I was lucky.  I did not know directly anyone harmed.  However, through various degrees of separation, we ALL know someone lost to the terrorist attacks of 9-11.  So on this solemn anniversary, I send my thoughts and prayers to everyone affected by the devastation in hopes that peace and positivity will continue to shine through Old Glory, and her Red, White, and Blue.

Friday Fatigue = Bad Mommy Voice

So it has been a while since "Bad Mommy Voice" has visited.  You know, that gutteral mean voice that comes from the bottom of your abdomen and works it way up loudly, angrily.  It happens to me, though I don't like to admit it.  I try to keep "the voice" at bay, but occasionally it rears its ugly head.

Like today in the car, after hearing whining and screaming, tattling and arguing from the minute we left the house to head to dinner.  I know the boys were tired, or rather exhausted, after their first week of school, learning new people and routines. I know I was tired of the same thing, but on the other side of the desk.  But the arguments of which Phineas and Ferb song to listen to followed by incoherent high pitched squeals, which turned out to be a version of "I dropped my cheese" lead me to pull over the car, throw it into park and let one good/bad mommy voice out.  I had had it.

The boys usually look at me, and then cry.  Today, just Mudge did.  Boog just watched and tried to explain what Mudge was screaming about.  Eventually we all deescalated and went on our (dare I say merry) way.

But as usual, I felt guilty afterwords.  Because it isn't their fault.  It is mine.  Letting my lack of patience get the better of me.  I suppose I should practice my "whoo sah" and rub my ears like Martin Lawrence from Bad Boys II.  But there are times even the pressure points just don't cut it.  I think back to TV moms like June Cleaver and Carol Brady.  Did they ever scream at their kids?  Can't you just picture it:

"Marsha, Marsha, Marsha...." says Jan.
"Jan, grow the F up and deal with it!" screams Carol.

OK. I do not throw the F bomb out at my kids (though sometimes I think it) but you get the idea.  So I am wrangling back the "bad mommy voice" into her deep dark cage, until she comes again.  In the mean time, I will control her with chocolate and Sangria.

OT Soap Box- Handwriting

It seems like the schools these days are forced to push kids beyond what they may be able to do.   You know, Kindergarten is the new first grade, Pre school is the new K.  But the problem is, you can't rush development.  Think back to basic child development classes that you may have taken.  There is a basic neurological development of fine motor and visual motor skills.  If you skip teaching these skills, the children often will struggle understanding more complex tasks.

As an occupational therapist in a public school setting, I see it more often than not.  What is the first letter you learn? A.  Two diagonal lines.  These kids are 3 years old.  Developmentally, a 3 year old may be able to form vertical and horizontal lines and a circle.  A 3 year old may struggle with the A because he hasn't developed the diagonal, crossing midline corner to corner.

So what do you do?  Well, luckily there are people, many of them OTs and teachers, who recognize this.  And some of those people have developed programs.  One of my favorites: Handwriting without Tears.   HWT is Jan Olsen's baby.  She is an OT who developed the program after her son struggled tearfully with his writing.  Jan was able to break the concepts down into a fun, practical and consistent technique that both kids and adults can use.  It was only in the past few years that a pre-k program was developed, but it has become a staple in my personal approach.

Mudge and Mat Man

I'll share a are a few key components.  

1. Because the little ones are in fact, little, HWT (and I) encourage use of small crayons.  Break them.  Its OK. And it may be cathartic.  Using small pieces promotes grasp development into eventually a "Tripod" or "Quadropod" grasp.   

2. Teach capitals first.  They are the same size.  They all start at the top.  

3. Use consistent language.  You can form you capitals with 4 simple concepts, Big/Little Lines and curves.  

4. Have fun and make it playful with music and movement.  Kids are multi-sensory learners.

Taping paper to the wall or an easel also helps to place the wrist in a better position to help the child use the inner muscles of the hand.  It also puts it directly in front of them, for better visual attention as well as encouraging the helper hand to stabilize

There is sooooo much more to handwriting than just a pencil and paper.  Language, cognition, position of the body, strength, coordination, vision, sensation, and the list goes on and on.  If one of these aspects is lagging, than chances are the overall outcome will be less than desirable.  If you think your child is struggling, becoming frustrated, not wanting to participating in crayon and paper activities, talk to his/her teacher or daycare provider.  See how (if) they are teaching Pre Writing concepts.  Then determine if something is missing.  If you think your child needs extra help, don't be afraid to ask.  You are your child's best advocate.  There are plenty of things out there.  Check out sites like Handwriting Without Tear, your local school department or child outreach for tips and contacts.